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My lanta, I’ve been meaning to write a blog for literally two months and today it’s happening, wherever this posts leads. I tend to have all of these ideas and inspirations and when it comes time to executing, I just have more ideas, lol. I’m ready to pursue more, create more, love more and just enjoy it all. I don’t think I’ve done a post like this before and I have a million other topics to share, but I was inspired by a novel today, titled “Hello Sunshine”, by Laura Dave. This was a culinary/finding yourself type book that looked great since my boyfriend and I are on a current top chef binge(yeah, from the beginning!). I thought it was a good way to use my brain instead of watching T.V. and receive that culinary/creative feeling. I finished the book and will return it to the library, but it really got me thinking of how I put so much emphasis on my online presence when it comes to my creative/business account and how I just need to enjoy and focus on the positive in general. Since I was so exhausted from the cider mill Sunday(which keeps getting better and better each sunday and truly feels amazing). I let myself lounge around with my cats and read this morning and then watched some of my fav you-tubers, and the down time was just what I needed. I feel clear headed, re-inspired and that I can conquer the week ahead. So back to the topic, online content. Below I’ve just stated a quote and how I related to it. If you feel the same as a creative or online presence I’d love to hear your thoughts! Quote: “That was the Cost of my curated life. I had no clue where I’d gotten so lost” So to set this up, the main character was a youtube/celebrity chef that was finally getting her big break. That came to an end when she was hacked and her true identity was revealed as an absolute fraud. This quote in particular made me think of where my attention is most of the time. I don’t think I try to put a false persona out into the world, I actually try to be very open and honest. Like most artists I am aware of my content and try to make it the best it can be, but content aside it’s the time- especially mentally that I devote to primarily my instagram account(because I love the visual aspect so much!). How many times have I not looked up at a special moment, or given my boyfriend a cheek when he tries to kiss me because I’m worried about a filter or announcement? I do care about my business and growing it, obviously since I’m pursuing it full time now, but It can't take over my complete existence. I can and will work hard at it but if I don’t pay attention to the other moments of my life and enjoy them then not only myself, but my work will be lacking as well. Idea: Living a well-rounded life benefits not only my quality of life but will be reflected in my work as well. Quote: “It was still trying to figure out what we lost in broadcasting our lives for everyone else's consumption. Before we took the time, you know, to figure out what we wanted our lives to add up to.” It took me 30 years to figure out what I wanted to do with my life, i just always knew what i was doing then wasn’t what I wanted. I’ve always been hiding, questioning, feeling trapped. Reading this quote made me think I am living the life I want and I need to seize it! I still struggle with anxiety, depression, fear and all of that- but I refuse to not try all my might by fighting against them! It also made me think of why do I care so much about followers? I love connecting my people and nothing feels better then when someone likes my work but if these are non-engaged followers, at a whopping 300 who cares! Do what you love and it will come. There a difference between wanting and cultivating your success and being obsessed with popularity, and that’s what this may be to me. A cry for popularity complex like I had in high school, well that got me real far! It kept me from real connections and friendships for sure, it’s not something I want to happen in my business and adult life as well. I would also love for my business to be primarily online, but I realize this is not what’s best for me. I really enjoy(after my nerves calm down) when people like and interact with my work. Like right now, I’m about to teach a class in the elementary school and I’m soooo nervous. I know after I get there and hang out with a gang of 5 year olds I will come back all smiles. It’s the time leading up, it’s outside my comfort zone and while it’s uncomfortable, it’s what's helping me grow tremendously. Idea: Do what makes you uncomfortable, focus on your work and doing the best job you can. The success is coming and by focusing on it, it will happen, Quote: “There was a lesson in that, which Z had taught me, about what we should pay attention to instead. About taking a hard look at what we are willing to throw away, about what we should be letting it show us”. Look around man(I say to myself). If I wonder if something is going to sell and it does, don’t wonder if it’s going to keep selling, enjoy it! As I’m progressing through being “self-employed” I feel like I’m getting stronger with each week. My organization is getting better, I’m sending out way more things and my sales have NEVER been so high. It feels amazing but I have mixed feelings. The business is overwhelming since I know it will get busier around the holidays. It's’ going to slow down at the first of the year. I happen to be reading another book that is law of attraction, making your success real. Ever since I have started thinking that way it has been happening. Don’t worry about the busy or the what if. I have plans, ideas and so much to explore. It’s going to happen so believe in yourself and more importantly enjoy it as well!! Idea: Believe in what you are doing, know that it is going to happen and stop worrying so much! You are awesome!! Well that’s my rant. I think this was more getting my interpretation from these words out. I just felt it, it resonated to what I’m going through at the moment. I’m so grateful I had the time to come to these realizations and to reflect on them. Now it’s off to teach and work on those etsy updates. Have a great day, and thanks so much for reading if you made it all way through!!
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